Sexting Part 1 Contiued

One way to know more about teens and sexting is to check out this link http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=7337547&page=1

Sexting , What a parent can do.- Part 1 of 4

Five months ago a former counseling client of mind dropped by the office for a quick visit. He seemed upset and as he entered the room he said, "Look at this! What to do I do about this?" He politely yet forcefully pushed a cellphone up to my eyes to view a topless picture of his fifteen year old daughter that she had emailed to her boyfriend. As as side note I have elected to never view a cell phone photo that a parent wants to show me.

In the past three months I have has three parents bring their 12-16 year old daughters into the office for sexting, sending partial nude or totally nude photos of themselves to their boyfriends.

Over the next few days I will be giving you links and key things you, as a parent can do to, to be effective in lowering the risk for you teen.

Principle 1 - You are the parent, you pay the bill, you own the phone, you have a right and responsibility to be a good watchdog.

Principle 2 - Get out of denial and learn how to check up on your kid. Privacy has to do with changing clothes and going to the bathroom, not all of their communications.

Check out this link from Good Morning America it is a group called wired moms, that gives you tools for checking out your kid's web presence. Here is their twitter page http://twitter.com/wiredmoms
John

Top Five Gripes Men Have About Women

Ladies, the mystery is solved. Research conducted by Dr. Micheal Cunningham confirms what I have thought for a long time. Men do have a common thread of gripes about women. In an effort to appreciate the differences here they are.

1. The silent treatment. Need I say more.
2. Bringing things up from the distant past.
3. Being too hot or too cold
4. Being critical
5. Being stubborn or refusing to give in.

I will write more on these later.

Six Ways to Treat Depression without Medication

By John Thurman M.Div., M.A., LCMHC

Feeling blue? Are you in a minor depression? Want to try and avoid medication?

With the roller coaster financial market, looming lay offs, rocky relationships and high divorces...it is no small matter that 6 million men were diagnosed with depression last year.

While you should get checked out by your doctor, and might look into some short-term therapy here are four things you can do to push back depression.

1. Sweat - P. Murali Doraiswamy, MD, chief of biological psychiatry at Duke University was part of a team that compared aerobic activity (30 min 3x a week, walking, cycling, or using an elliptical) with Zoloft. The studies found exercising "to be equally effective for treating mild to moderate depression."

2. Eat better - More salads, less red meat, fewer spirits and less sugar can impact mood in a positive way. Too much sugar, alcohol, food in general will slow you down.

3. Change the brain chatter - Learn how to challenge irrational thoughts and replace them with the good stuff.

4. Get more sunlight - Early morning light actually helps you feel better.

5. Go to church - Reconnecting spiritually is a proven way to improve you outlook and build hope.

6. Get involved in a small group. A bible study, life group, a task oriented group, or a support group. Being involved with a small group has multiple benefits.

Free Depression Tip Sheet

Overcoming Depression

Now that I have established some basic info concerning Major Depression, and have given you some very basic things you can do, I'd like to turn my attention to some practical ways you can begin to move out from depression into joy.

Apart from medications, exercise, supplements, and medical care there are some things you can do both with you thinking and with your spirituality to help push back depression.

I am a strong believer in the notion that Feelings are the direct result of Thoughts and one of the keys to overcoming depression is to understand how the sad thought process works.

Here is a basic view of the A-B-C's of how thoughts impact out feelings

A - Adversity, what pushes your buttons. People struggling with depression and other mood disorders this usually involves some type of loss. I will discuss this more in my next blog. The adversity is an event that stimulates a thought process.

B - Belief, the immediate belief that pop up when adversity hits the button.

C- Consequences, the resulting feelings that result when A+B happens

One of the keys to overcoming depression is to realize how this sequence can have an impact on how your deal with depression.

Here are some things you can do to begin the process of moving out of depression into hope.

• If you have been depressed or have had feelings of hopelessness or suicide get checked out by your physician, particularly if you have felt this way for more than a couple of weeks.
  
• If you need therapy, get some.
• Begin taking a good multivitamin and some Omega 3, (this will not cure depression, but will help your brain and body push back on depression.
  
• Check out some helpful websites: Dr. Daniel Amen, My Depression Tip Sheet, Focus on the Family
• Check out my Bible Study on Depression
• Avoid isolation, be sure to be around people who know and love you.
• Begin moving, working out, walking around your block. Physical exercise can give you additional energy to defeat depression.
• Look at coming to my Overcoming Depression Conference in Colorado Springs in late January

Next entry will look at the three types of losses and how they can set us up for depression.

What is Depression Part 3

So where does depression come from? Is it just a choice? is it a chemical imbalance? where does it come from?

There are several factors that can have an impact on depression. Here are five: (this is not an exhaustive list)

Physical

• Illness (including Diabetes, Heart Disease)
  
• Sleep Loss
• Chemical Imbalance (hormones, neurochemistry)
• Stress
• Nutritional Issues
• Post-Partem Issues
  

Genetics

• Family History of Depression

Situational

• Family Issues
• Business/Work Issues
• Marriage Issues

Psychological

• Loneliness
• Lack of Purpose
• Loss/Grief
• Rejection

Spiritual

• Sin
• Fatigue
• God sent trials
• Spiritual Warfare
• Bitterness and resentment
• Grief

If you want to learn more about depression check out some of these sites: Focus on the Family; Mental Health America; Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance; and the American Psychiatric Foundation

If you are interested in attending an Overcoming Depression Workshop with John Thurman Click this link: Overcoming Depression.

What is Depression? Part 2

Depression is like an oil leak in an engine. One of the things that happens when you are depressed is you become disconnected from that part of you that is a positive, hopeful person. Your optimism is slowly replaced with hopelessness and isolation. What may have been experiencing some ups and downs in life but these ups and downs turn into ruts, with no end in sight. Much like a car with an oil leak, over time you may feel like you are breaking down.

Let's look at the car analogy for moment. Oil helps your car run well because it reduces the friction between the moving parts of your engine. Car manufactures recommend that you change your oil and oil filter every 3,000 miles. Why? Because as you drive your car around you get wear and tear on your engine, your oil gets dirty and the filter doesn't work as effectively. Other than regular oil and filter changes you really don't have to do too much to maintain your oil in your car.

Problems arise when there is a leak in they system. It may start as a small leak that constantly requires new oil, or in a really bad situation, you may have a cracked oil pan.

That is how depression can be for some people. The depression-resistant person maintains their oil levels well, and when the engine needs a tune up or repair, they do it. The depression-prone person usually has a leaky oil system or a cracked oil pan that requires continual love, success, or reassurance to operate effectively, unless something is done to repair the system.

Depression impacts us in six primary areas;

1. Feelings - how we manage our emotional lives
2. Behavior - how we direct our actions, how we arrange our time, our habits, and our energy
3. Thoughts - how we watch over our thoughts, our assumptions about our self, the world, and how things work
4. Faith - how we view our relationship to God
5. Relationships - how we act with others as well as what we want and expect from them
6. Self Image - how we think about and perceive ourselves

Depression is a hope stealer.

Now for some good news! You can learn to overcome depression!

Here are some things you can do to begin the process of moving out of depression into hope.

• If you have been depressed or have had feelings of hopelessness or suicide get checked out by your physician, particularly if you have felt this way for more than a couple of weeks.
  
• If you need therapy, get some.
• Begin taking a good multivitamin and some Omega 3, (this will not cure depression, but will help your brain and body push back on depression.
  
• Check out some helpful websites: Dr. Daniel Amen, My Depression Tip Sheet, Focus on the Family
• Check out my Bible Study on Depression
• Avoid isolation, be sure to be around people who know and love you.
• Begin moving, working out, walking around your block. Physical exercise can give you additional energy to defeat depression.
• Look at coming to my Overcoming Depression Conference in Colorado Springs in late January